What does it mean to really love? I know how most of us love which is based off of attraction and honestly this form of love is definitely not the one you want to be apart of. So, if we put attraction aside and take love for what it is what do we have? To me love is a codex of all our emotions experienced as we were becoming an adult. We take all these moments of emotion given to us from our parents, then smash it down into a nice little codex this codex becomes our version of love and what we end up looking for in another.
Of course, we almost always become attracted to someone first and I think that’s because our codex in incomplete. Our subconscious sees something in the other person that we need to learn. So, it goes oh look at them I like that one lets go get it. Of course, if you start this relationship up and you don’t learn from the person then you never really get much and end up losing a piece of yours. Do this to many times and you might very likely lose love for yourself completely. The key is to always learn from every relationship and interaction you have.
Of course, what happens if we fill this codex up and we make it whole? I believe this is the point at which we fall out of love. So, you obtain the person and once you learn what you need from then you start to lose those feelings of love there gone. What’s going on I mean you have been with them for years why don’t you feel anything anymore. Do you not love them anymore? Of course, you do, the feelings you had were never meant to be love they was only meant to keep you together while you learned to love yourself. now that you have accomplished this there’s no need for the attraction. Now you should love yourself so completely that you don’t need love from anyone else.
See I think this is real love, to love yourself in a way that completes you. When you and you partner both do this in a positive way you no longer need anything from each other. You can at this point truly start to enjoy each other company. Instead of needing something from them you only want them for who they are and not what they can give you. The relationship becomes about sharing stories and communication, you feel secure enough that you can both live you own lives. Being in a position to have your own life freely and with no fear and a safe loving place to return home to gives you a freedom that can only be described as love. All your dreams and passions seem to all the sudden to be an option.
This is part of love I think is the best the part where you water each other and support each other as you become the people you want to be. You have no fear of failure because there’s someone there to keep you from falling. You don’t worry about feeling like enough because you each are doing what you love. Perusing what you love without fear of failing or rejection from you spouse life starts to become almost like a fairy tale. Your happy in love and at the same time your making a difference in the world. Your able to return home and share all the details of you day as well all the feelings you felt. Then you listen as you partner tells you the same. The two of you share everything that happened without fear and it makes you feel closer than ever.
This love isn’t one people get to experience very often simply put there two caught up in feeling. Most are so empty and reliant on things such as sex to feel that they don’t see there giving up parts of themselves to feel and even that isn’t enough at some point. What no one seems to realizes is that this love is the truest and life changing love there is. Yet we live in a world that promote sexually exploring quite young. This severely prolongs the Childs experience to find real love because they never even get to the part where they fall out of love. If your smart you will hold out and wait saving the experience for someone special. Regardless what they tell you if you’re with the one who loves you all the things you may want to “explore” would still be an option.
See after you fall out of love and you grow next comes the start of a new cycle. You consider kids together having explored your purpose in the world, left you mark, been places you have dreamed of. The best part all these experiences where you while being in love. That means every detail will be stored into your memory for you to watch like a movie when you get old. You can see why finding real love is worth forgoing the pleasure and looking for someone you see a life with become important. When you older and on your death bed you don’t want to lay there looking back at a life full of superficial experiences that you can’t even remember. You get to lay there and dream of all the best moment of your life. From the mark you made on the world to the person who was your world and then the miracle you all made year after year.